How Love Is A Choice
You choose how you prioritize your time.
You don’t have to spend every waking second with your significant other. I think I might actually advise against that. However, quality time is so important for a relationship. Are you spending enough time growing together? Or do your individual interests and priorities always trump together-time? Are you putting love first? You choose love when you choose to make quality time together a priority.
You choose to compromise.
The reality is that a marriage often requires some sacrifice from both sides. You sacrifice a few nights of watching your favorite show to support your husband’s work events. He sacrifices a day of Saturday football to go shopping with you to pick out a new blazer for your work presentation. It is give and take. It is meet in the middle. When you both feel like you might be sacrificing just a little too much and a little too often, then you are probably finally doing it right. Things will never be 100% fair. Some days you give a little more. Other days you will take a little more. Somewhere down the road it all almost evens out. You choose love when you choose to compromise and make sacrifices.
You choose to let little things go.
Some things are worth hashing out. Some things just aren’t. You love your spouse more than you hate the socks on the floor. Sometimes you have to let dirty socks lie. Getting upset often isn’t worth the toll it can take on a relationship. Pick your battles. Remember the things you get upset over are often just that…material things. Their worth is nothing compared to the worth of the human being you are married to. You choose love when you choose to let little things go that aren’t worth getting upset over.
You choose to work for it.
Marriages that fall apart are commonplace these days. There are several reasons marriages should end such as abuse or infidelity. I’m not staying to stay in a marriage where these things are happening. I am saying don’t give up on your marriage when there are other issues that could be worked out instead. There are a lot of reasons people get divorces that probably could have been worked through. Don’t throw in the towel until it is drenched with your sweat from working so hard to make your marriage great. Go to counseling, try to truly work on your weaknesses that are damaging your relationship, and put in a ton of effort. You choose love when you choose to work on and for your marriage.
You choose to be the best you can be.
When times are difficult in marriage, we often focus on our partner’s flaws. It will make a world of difference if you focus on your own flaws instead. Stop analyzing whether or not your partner is adding up and analyze whether you are adding up? Setting goals for yourself emotionally, behaviorally, physically, and mentally is a starting point of how to show your spouse you love them. Take care of yourself, be the best you can be for yourself and for your spouse. You choose love when you choose to work on yourself and strive to be the best you can be.
You choose your vows and promises to each other over all else.
You made vows. You made promises to each other. Honoring that commitment is a great way to show love. You choose love when you choose to keep those vows and live up to those promises you made no matter how much time has passed since you made them.
Love is a choice. What you choose to do demonstrates whether or not you are choosing love. Prioritizing your time with your spouse, compromising, letting the little things go, working for your marriage, being the best you can be, and honoring your vows and promises are all choices you make. Choose love.
What are some other ways you can choose love? What are some other signs that love is a choice?