7 Reasons To Get Married Before Career Establishment
When you get married young, you often face some grief for it. Young marriage used to be the norm generations ago, but in our generation people think you are crazy. I got married at twenty years old so I know how the judgements feel, but it was the best thing I ever did. A lot of people might tell you to wait until have a steady income before you get married, but here are some reasons why to get married before you establish your career.
1. You are not already set in your ways.
When you have a steady job, you get in a schedule. You do yoga in the morning, spend your nine-to-five at the office, come home, whip up some pasta, and eat it while you watch Greys Anatomy on the couch with your dog before hopping into bed early. On the weekends you have wild girls-night-outs with your friends. When Monday rolls around again, you repeat.
If you get married after this routine is in full swing, you have to do some serious adjusting when your partner comes into your life. Maybe your husband hates Greys, Italian food, and going to bed early. Most likely your differences won’t be so prominent, but there will be some differences and change is hard. Getting married before having a routine for your career is a wonderful opportunity. It allows you to set a routine with your partner and then squeeze in work around your date nights and dinners together.
2. You have a constant cheerleader.
When you get married before you establish a career, you have a build in support system as you work towards your goals. You have someone to help you practice interview questions, fill out job applications, and provide you with comfort when you don’t get the big promotion you wanted. You have someone to talk you through your work-related problems.
I completed a fifteen-week internship that was forty hours a week and I had to drive over two hours a day to get to and from the internship site. Every single day, my husband cooked a nice dinner for me, discussed how to solve problems that arose at my internship, and supported me in other ways. My internship would have been much harder without my husband by my side. I will get to return the favor as my husband starts dental school.
Your spouse is there to encourage you and push you to keep working. It’s true that a good friend could do some of these things for you, but there is something special about having your spouse be the one to help you. Who could be more invested in your decisions and dreams than the person you are going to spend the rest of your life with?
3. You have more choices.
Let’s be honest, you have more choices when you are in college. When you are in college and getting a degree to put towards a future career, you have a high number of people to choose from. You have more potential people to date. There are people in your classes, all around campus, attending football games and other events. You are surrounded by so many opportunities for interaction. You probably won’t find more choices of suitable suitors anywhere else. Every year you get older, it seems that the percentage of marriage material decreases.
I’m not saying you can’t find anyone to marry later, I’m just saying you might not have as many people to pick from. When you establish your career, there are less places you interact with others. You are surrounded by the people you work with, or you can try to go out an meet someone on the weekends. It just isn’t as easy as sitting on campus and striking a conversation with one of the thousands of eligible contenders passing by.
4. You build an empire together.
If you get married before you establish your career, you are a team from the start. You can make a business plan for your family. You help each other to both be successful in your given fields of work. You can plan which investments to make and which investments you want to avoid. Because you started the goals together, you also don’t have to adjust your personal financial goals to a new partner when you get married. Also, just because there are two of you, your living expenses don’t necessarily double but the number of incomes your family earns does. Two incomes equals more money. More money equals more power to build your empire.
5. You don’t have to relocate again.
Marriage often means one person in the relationship has to leave their job and find one closer to where they have chosen to live as a couple. This can be a sad experience. You spend a lot of time working hard and growing within the company as you build a career. It would not be fun to leave all that behind in order to build you and your new husband’s dream home. Sometimes this can even lead to choosing between your dream job and your dream guy. Some people think you should not relocate for a man and that you should put yourself first. However, true love is about compromise. You will each give something up for your marriage at some point. It can be much easier to be married beforehand.
Different career paths may still require you to relocate even after you have been married a long time, but you can save yourself some trouble if you get married first. You and your husband can choose where you want to live together, and then both find jobs in that area. Or if one of you has less job opportunities throughout the country, they can land a job first. The other partner with more opportunities can then find a job nearby. This way neither of you have to uproot a career that you have spent so much time moving up in the company.
6. Your spouse can help you figure out who you are.
A lot of people will tell you to give yourself a lot of time before you get married to figure out who you are and what you want to do. I agree that you need to know who you are as a separate person, but I think having a spouse can help you. Your spouse challenges you to be your best self. Their encouragement to chase your dreams could give you the push to apply for a job you otherwise would pass on. We don’t always hold ourselves accountable, so when there is someone else checking in and following up we can accomplish more. Together you can figure out who you are individually and who you are as a couple.
7. You put each other first from the start.
I love know that I come first in my husband’s life, and he knows he comes first in mine. Work is just something we do to support our family and each other. When you get married later, you are often used to putting your job first and it can be difficult to shift your priorities around. You don’t have to choose between work and your spouse because you already know who comes first. You choose to make time for your partner instead of always going out with your coworkers after work. Putting your partner first is a habit. Your loyalty lies with your spouse, not your job.
As you can see, there are several reasons that getting married before establishing a career is beneficial. But keep in mind that everyone is different and has unique circumstances. But if you are getting married young and receiving some harsh judgements for it, sharing this post with them may open their minds. Sign up for the free monthly newsletter for more posts on marriage. And if you’re already married check out the Marriage Bond Challenge and watch yourself grow.
What are some other benefits to getting married young?